One Hundred and Eighty Three

all of my days

how could you be missed when you're everywhere all the time?
exactly. : )

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I've given birth. Yes, I'm aware of how strange that sounds, but I have, in fact, given life to something, or perhaps someone new. You see, I had this dream last night. It was kind of funny and terrifying at the same time, but I'll tell you about it. It was so normal feeling that I didn't recognize it as a dream when I woke up, more as a distant memory, so it wasn't until hours later that I even considered it as indeed a figment of my imagination. Because of the time elapsed, the details have faded quite a bit-- the storyline and the characters were almost ghost-like by then. This is all I recall: I realize I'm pregnant, either someone asks me or I have a strange feeling and I just know, then I think someone points it out that I am clearly pregnant and I go on the defense trying to explain that it's not possible because I AM A VIRGIN. Then it seems the only reasonable explanation is that God himself must have done this. Shit.

[Enter DreamDictionary.com]

Virgin Mary
To see the Virgin Mary in your dream, signifies selfless love, compassion, spiritual harmony and ideal motherhood. Alternatively, the Virgin Mary represents a repressed fear of sexuality or difficulties in relationships.

[Enter TresSugar.com]

Actually, pregnancy dreams for women are pretty common, and they usually represent new beginnings, renewed connections with others, changes in your life or career, or something in the future you're looking forward to. Being pregnant in your dream is usually a positive thing, and indicates that you're growing in your life or in a relationship. It can also be a symbol for how you're blossoming creatively or spiritually.

it's because i've been painting isn't it? because i've had kiddos on the brain. because i've felt a strange new inner calm lately.

i'm sure of it.